What Does 5 Days of Silence Do?

Oh my god… I’m 25, unemployed, living at my parent’s, and have NO IDEA what I want to do with my life. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO??!!

not freak out.

When I finished my contract with the Peace Corps in March, I freaked. the. eff. out. because I didn’t have my next step planned out. All my life, I’ve always known what my next move was, what my next adventure was, but this time I just had no idea

and it was scary as hell.

Over the last month in Ecuador, while attending a 300 hour yoga teacher training course with Living in the Self, I realized that everything will be okay (obviously). Everyday we would meditate, learn, and practice. But it wasn’t until our 5 days of silence that I really felt something shift within.

Our amazing teachers Kristof and Tiffany

Actually, it wasn’t until the moment we broke silence did I realize the gravity of this experience.

I cried and cried and cried some more.

I stopped feeling guilty for things I have no control over.

I stopped trying to be in control.

I felt emotions.

I allowed my thoughts to be separate from myself.

I realized the mind is a trickster and allowed my heart to lead.

I forgave myself.

I learned the importance of loving me.

Often times, I think it’s easy for us to be confused by yoga. Is it about the pretty handstands or the crazy back bends? Is it about the pictures or the cute yoga pants?

I myself had some misconceptions.

But during this course, I really began my journey of yoga– a journey of liberation and freedom, of allowing myself to be a vessel of love and compassion, and of being present in each and every moment (well at least trying).


Every thought of the mind is just a story to get lost in, but reality is here, now.


I still have no real plan of what I’m doing, but now I’m okay with it. I’m going to spend the rest of this year looking for the place I want to grow my roots in and let the wind decide where that place will be.



  1. emvardz

    I’m also 25, living with my parents, and have no idea what I’m doing with my life – so of course I had to read this. Now I’m just pretty jealous of you – that looked like a fabulous experience!
    You’re right though – we can’t stress ourselves trying to figure it all out; everything will work out in time.

    1. leabearr

      Yes, everything will work out 🙂 Trust in the universe that we will find our calling and be happy with the moments we are blessed with today. Have fun finding your path!

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